MY DAD

A little over 42 years ago, my Dad was the best man at my wedding.  That was probably one of the easiest decisions I ever made, because, you see, my Dad was ALWAYS the Best Man.

We lost our Dad on Friday and while our family is mourning the loss, it is even more appropriate to celebrate his remarkable life.  The sheer number of people's lives that he touched over his nearly 90 years is astounding. His caring, kind manner was infectious and he instilled the values of family in all of his children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren. Because, THAT was the most important thing in his life...family.  Not just as he aged, but always.

My Dad was the most involved Dad of his generation. There was hardly anything his four sons were involved in that he wasn't totally invested in. From Little League to forming the high school football booster club to becoming the first president of the University of Georgia Parents Association, there was not much of anything he wouldn't do to support his "boys."  And that included teaching us the life lessons that helped make us the people we are today....there is no substitute for hard work; you do whatever you need to do to accomplish the objective; kindness; compassion, keeping a sense of humor.....in short, how to be a a mensch.

If being loved was currency, then my Dad was one of the wealthiest men on earth.  His four sons love for him was equaled or exceeded by his daughters in law who adored him. All of His eight grandchildren had special relationships with their Poppi and he had a unique ability to make each one feel special, conspiratorially professing to each grandchild that he or she was his "favorite."  And as hard as it is to do, each one was his favorite!  One of the first words his great grandchildren learned was "Poppi." During his final days, we were fortunate enough to include Poppi in his newest great grandson's Bris, via Skype, and the pride he exhibited will be remembered for eternity.

Dad had many dear friends and also had great affection for the friends of his sons. Over the years, he referred to several of our friends as his "fifth son" and they reciprocated the love and respect that he showed.  His grandchildren's friends even called him Poppi!

Dad's memory and sense of history is going to be missed. He was my go to resource on Atlanta history, Atlanta Jewish history and family history. His recall of events, people and tidbits of information was astounding. After all, he accumulated nearly 90 years of stored information and could retrieve it faster than Google.

I love the fact that Dad was the "coolest" Dad and Grandfather around. He couldn't be shocked!  It didn't matter to him if a son or grandchild was slightly unconventional or even screwed up royally.  His support and understanding was unwavering. And, he tried to keep up with the times....utilizing his computer for email, bill pay and Skype. There are not many octogenarians that make that kind of effort.

His support of his sons and grandchildren was unwavering. Our successes were his successes. Our triumphs, his triumphs.  And he even shared our bumps in the road. He was so proud of all of us in all of our endeavors.

His "never give up" attitude was exhibited in the last couple of months of his life as he got a new car, continued to buy new clothes and, although he was barely getting around with his walker, professing to a friend that he planned on getting back on the golf course soon.  We use to joke with him that it was amazing that such a bad golfer could love the game so much. He loved to play, watch and read about golf. But, I think golf was also a convenient way to be with friends and connect with his sons that play.

Dad loved to watch sports. Most every day you could find him in front of the television watching his Braves or Falcons.  Although he never went to college, he also became a big Georgia Bulldog fan.

Dad's emotional side is legendary in our family. Not only did he tear up when the National Anthem is played at a ball game, we could always count on waterworks when the family gathered or when any
significant or even not so significant event occurred involving a family member.  He taught all of us that showing emotion is a good thing.

The incredible amount of respect and love toward my father was evident in the sheer number of people that attended his funeral and Shiva in Atlanta.  People from all aspects and time of his remarkable life came to give him the proper send off.  I saw people that I haven't seen in over 40 years...friends of ours from college and even childhood and high school friends.....all people that were touched by my Dad.

My Dad wasn't only my best man, he was my best friend.  And I will miss him every day.



And The Journey continues.................

UP, UP and Away!

When I was growing up in my comfortable, suburban, Jewish house in Atlanta, I was never exposed very much to the outdoor adventures of hiking, camping, hunting or fishing.  Our outdoor actiivities were more of the baseball, football, basketball, and bicycle riding variety.  Sure, we walked an awful lot...other than bike riding, it was the best way to get around.  If we wanted to go somewhere for fun, it was usually walk, bike or take the bus!  But hike for fun?  Other than moseying around the woods near our house foraging for wild blackberries, there was not much hiking!  Camping?  I think the only time I slept outdoors was the one year I went to sleep away camp.  Hunting?  Not on your life - that would mean I had to kill something.  Fishing?  Except for the few times on vacation, not so much, until I owned a boat a few years ago.

So, the rugged outdoor gene was not prevalent in our family.  Which begs the question....how did my daughter and son become such hiking and camping aficionados?  When Lisa was about 15 years old, she announced that she wanted to go on an Outward Bound Survival Course in Colorado.  Wait a minute...isn't that where they send juvenile delinquents as punishment?  But she went and hiked, camped, climbed her first 14,000 foot peak and survived!  Not only did she survive, but became enamored with the great outdoors.  After college, she moved to Aspen and continued her love affair with the mountains...A year in Africa ensued including a climb of Mt. Kilimanjaro.. and she moved back to Colorado and completed her goal of climbing all fifty-four 14,000 ft. Peaks in Colorado.  I won't even get into the 100 mile bike rides, half marathons and other assorted outdoor adventures.

AND she convinced her brother to also go on an Outward Bound Trip.  I think he was the only 15 year old on that Survival Course that wasn't ordered there by a Juvenile Court.  He told me it was one of the hardest things he ever did but that he was glad he did and found out just how far he could push himself.  And if that wasn't enough, when he graduated from college, he did a sea kayaking Outward Bound in Puget Sound.  Now, he has introduced my grandson to camping and hiking!

It is not enough that they love these endeavors, but somehow feel it is their responsibility to suck old Dad into the adventures.  Mom has also done numerous short hikes to picturesque spots in Colorado, but Lisa has always pushed me to do more!

 It started a few years back when Lisa suggested that we ride our Bikes from Boca Raton to Key West...its only a couple of hundred mile!  So, we started out early one morning and got to the beach just as the sun began peeking over the eastern horizon.  I knew that Lisa was a much faster cycler so I told her that I would always be on the road closest to the ocean as we pedaled south.  Before the first hour was over, Lisa was out of sight...I continued to pedal past Deerfield Beach, Pompano Beach, and Fort Lauderdale Beach and still no sign of Lisa.  Now, this was before everybody had a cell phone, but even though I had one tucked into my backpack, I never checked it knowing that Lisa didn't have one. So, I continued on finally arriving in South Beach in Miami around noon.  It was then, sitting on the corner of US1 and Lincoln Road that I wearily sat down and found my cell phone deep in the backpack.  Lisa had left me 26 messages and she and Connie were going from hospital to hospital looking for me!  Oops!  So, they met me in South Beach, read me the riot act, had lunch and we continued our journey.  Well, we never made it to Key West.  Halfway through the second day we arrived in Key Largo, had lunch at the pool of the Marriott resort and I decided we had gone far enough.  Connie and Brad met us with the car's bike rack and we played in The Keys for a couple of days and drove home.

A few years later, Lisa talked me into climbing Mt. Princeton in Colorado.  A 14,000+ peak that she described as "easy."  We left from our comfy Hotel in Snowmass about 4:30 in the morning and arrived at the trail head before there were many cars in the lot.  Since I had been in Colorado for a few days and had even taken a few short hikes, I was somewhat acclimated to the altitude and the first part of the hike was pretty easy as it was mostly on a road.  I remember that I thought we were approaching the summit only to find out that there are many false summits before you actually can see the highest peak.  We travailed on switch backs and into a nasty boulder field.  By this time we had been hiking for some time and, of course, Lisa had gone off and left me again!  As I was struggling to summit and was about 200 feet from pay dirt, Lisa came running down the mountain to inform me that she had been waiting for over an hour at the top and she was headed back down because of the approaching clouds.  Clouds?  I don't see any friggin' clouds...but she was adamant, so I headed back down with her without actually reaching the summit.  Twelve hours round trip on the trail...and a feeling of futility!

There were other attempts over the years...we went to hike Quandry Peak, another 14er, but after Lisa got us on the wrong trail for some time and I suffered back spasms, we aborted that climb.  There was the hike up Humboldt Peak, another14er where we got caught in a 2 hour hail storm and had to retreat.  We have had many successful smaller hikes to delightful places like Hanging Lake and

American Lake near Aspen, the Ute in Aspen, up Vail Mountain and many trips up and down Mt. Sanitas in Boulder, but my attempts of completing a major hike up a mountain had been futile.

 

So, when Lisa suggested we climb Mt. Washington in New Hampshire, I was certainly intrigued by the idea.  Our friends have a house on Lake Winnipesauke and had invited us for a long weekend, and I agreed that one day could be taken to attempt this climb.  Mt. Washington is the highest point in the Northeast US and is reputed to have the worse weather of any spot in the Continental United States.  To prepare myself, I undertook a regiment of 5 to 10 mile daily walks...until my back went out again, a mere 3 weeks before the climb.  But not to disappoint Lisa or myself, I rested and iced for 2 weeks and declared myself fit for the climb.  We woke at 4:30 on a beautiful Saturday morning to drive the one and a half hours to Mt. Washington.  Lisa had done the research and decided on the Jewell Path...a bit longer than other trails, but "gentler."  And it started at the Cog Railway station....so, if needed, I could always ride the Cog back down the mountain!  The beginning of the hike was beautiful...lush foliage and some of the most spectacular mushrooms I've ever seen.  It took me about 15 minutes to lose the long sleeve shirt and was sweat-soaked soon thereafter.  The weather was terrific and all of the clothes I was hauling in my backpack were totally unnecessary.  I trudged along pretty well and Lisa would get ahead of me and then, "surprise," she actually waited for the old man!  Once we reached above tree line and the terrain became all boulders, I really slowed down and Lisa became somewhat frustrated with me. But like the EverReady bunny, I just kept going and going and going (damn, am I ever going to get there - I've seen the top for over an hour!).  One last push and SUCCESS!  I FINALLY reached the summit with Lisa!  No, it wasn't a 14er, but our altitude gain was just as great as the altitude gain on many 14ers.  Yes, we took the Cog back down the mountain, but the feeling of reaching the summit was all I was hoping for!

So, in talking about the various adventures that Lisa has gotten me into, I have been asked if I ever considered that she is trying to kill me.  Nah, I don't think so, she only wants me to share in experiences that are most important to her......and for that, I am grateful!!  Let's do another one!!!

And The Journey continues..........

The World's Neediest Dog (Redux)

 

                                                      RIP Bella, the Dog, Cohen

My faithful, four legged companion, Bella, looked into my eyes this afternoon and let me know it was time.  Her battle against lymphoma and other assorted tumors had taken its toll and she no longer had the strength to go on.  So, we gave her the gift of peace this afternoon and she is now romping in Doggie Heaven with other great dogs we have known.

On January 12, 2011, I wrote a Blog about Bella, "The World's Neediest Dog"  and am reprinting it here....it is a fitting tribute to my Best-4-legged Friend !

The World's Neediest Dog

There have always been pets around. Growing up, we always had a dog in the family. My early childhood pet was Boots, a Heinz 57 variety mutt that might have been the coolest dog ever. In those days, the dog was only allowed in the house when the weather was absolutely dreadful. Otherwise, she slept outside by the back door. Boots was a tough old bitch. Because she was kept in the fenced-in backyard, chasing cars was just too inviting when she escaped her confines! Hit by cars numerous times, Boots survived albeit with only one eye and several operations. Although Mom always insisted that Boots was "the Boys" dog, we all knew that she was my Mom's dog. Unfortunately, Boots met her demise when, mostly blind, she ran between the front and back tires of a moving car in our driveway. She was followed by Yogi and Candy ....more mutts that considered Mom their master. In between those dogs, there was Jett, a head strong mean German Shepherd that was given away after he bit my younger brother.

Once I was married, we adopted another mutt...Peanut. I say "we" but Peanut was really Connie's dog. Peanut died young and was followed by Sadie, the hero dog. Sadie is generally credited with saving our lives as she woke us up early one morning because our apartment building was on fire. Although we were rescued by firemen with ladders from our 3rd floor apartment, Sadie was nowhere to be found and presumed dead. Two days later, Sadie was found alive in an adjacent wooded area by neighborhood kids. She evidently escaped the fire through the front door and although slight charred, survived to accompany us to our new house in Atlanta, our 4 years in Boston and a few years in Boca Raton. Sadie was a Damn Good Dog whose Master was, again, Connie!

 

After Sadie's demise, Lisa prodded us into a cocker spaniel pup...Tootsie. After promises from Lisa that she would take care of the new puppy, Tootsie settled into also being Connie's dog! Tootsie lived to a ripe old age and we decided that she would be the last dog that we would own. So, dogless, we babysat Lisa's dog, Kota, for a year while Lisa was in Africa. Kota and I bonded and I was convinced that he had become MY dog and would want to stay with me once Lisa returned. How wrong I was! Lisa walked into our house after 11 months away and Kota immediately returned to her side as if I didn't even exist.

Eight and a half years ago (NOTE: Now over 11 years ago!), I was prodded by a friend to go look at a puppy at the animal Shelter in West Palm Beach (a kill shelter-the dogs are euthanized if homes cannot be found). A puppy would be a terrific Mother's Day present for Connie! After almost leaving without a dog, this little 7 week old Australian Shepherd/Black Lab fur ball rubbed against my leg, looked up at me with "take me home" eyes and crawled into my heart. Upon presentation to Connie as her Mother's Day gift, she announced that she didn't want a dog! Uh oh, I guessed that finally, I was the proud Master of a dog. Little did I know that Bella was going to actually be the Master of me.

Bella is the sweetest, smartest and most needy dog in the world. I am convinced that she understands everything I tell her and, in fact, understands hundreds of words. One of her problems is that she doesn't know that she is a dog. She sleeps in our bed and is positive that everybody that comes to the house is there to see her and to play with her. Nearly every morning we start the day together with a 2 to 3 mile walk and then she "rests" most of the afternoon. Bella would much rather interact with humans than with other dogs. In fact, she severely dislikes small dogs - especially those that incessantly yap! When we kept Brad and Claire's dog, Rudy, for the year they were in Israel, Bella loved having a playmate and was depressed when Rudy left. However, she got over that and became convinced that I, rather than other dogs, should be her play pal. She is always around - under my feet at my desk, next to my recliner while we watch TV, curled around my feet in bed, on my chest as my wake-up call, bringing me her ball to throw when I am trying to relax and sitting by the table during meals. If I go upstairs, she goes upstairs...if I go outside, she wants to go with me...and she always wants to go in the car - until we actually go in the car, then she cries the whole time!

Those that meet Bella instantly recognize her needy manner...always wanting to be the center of attention and never giving up easily. Bella is MY dog and I love her. And for that, her middle name is "the last one."

Postscript:  Bella passed away peacefully in my arms at the Vet's office today, July 3, 2013.  We will miss her!

And The Journey continues..............................

IT'S A CROCK!

It has been some time since my last blog post, but that doesn't mean I haven't been paying attention...I just haven't lately been motivated to write...but, SURPRISE!, I DO have some thoughts on what is going on in our Country today.

I use to love to tell a farcical tale about swiping an old bag lady's shopping bag.  The story prodded the listener to ask what was in the bag, which gave me the opportunity to deliver the punch line," a crock of s**t, just like this story."  And that's exactly what I think of our Congress and it's "sequester" drama.  It's all a crock of s**t. 

Robert Reich, former Secretary of Labor and currently Chancellor's Professor of Public Policy at The University of California recently wrote a blog titled "The Sequester and The Tea Party Plot."  His analysis started with:

Imagine a plot to undermine the government of the United States, to destroy much of its capacity to do the public's business, and to sow distrust among the population.

Imagine further that the plotters infiltrate Congress and state governments, reshape their districts to give them disproportionate influence in Washington, and use the media to spread big lies about the government.

Finally, imagine they not only paralyze the government but are on the verge of dismantling pieces of it.

 

Far-fetched? Perhaps. But take a look at what's been happening in Washington and many state capitals since Tea Party fanatics gained effective control of the Republican Party, and you'd be forgiven if you see parallels.

 

Tea Party Republicans are crowing about the "sequestration" cuts beginning today (Friday). "This will be the first significant tea party victory in that we got what we set out to do in changing Washington," says Rep. Tim Huelskamp (Kan.), a Tea Partier who was first elected in 2010.

Sequestration is only the start. What they set out to do was not simply change Washington but eviscerate the U.S. government -- "drown it in the bathtub," in the words of their guru Grover Norquist -- slashing Social Security and Medicare, ending worker protections we've had since the 1930s, eroding civil rights and voting rights, terminating programs that have helped the poor for generations, and making it impossible for the government to invest in our future.

 

Sequestration grew out of a strategy hatched soon after they took over the House in 2011, to achieve their goals by holding hostage the full faith and credit of the United States -- notwithstanding the Constitution's instruction that the public debt of the United States "not be questioned."
To avoid default on the public debt, the White House and House Republicans agreed to harsh and arbitrary "sequestered" spending cuts if they couldn't come up with a more reasonable deal in the interim. But the Tea Partiers had no intention of agreeing to anything more reasonable. They knew the only way to dismember the federal government was through large spending cuts without tax increases.

Nor do they seem to mind the higher unemployment their strategy will almost certainly bring about. Sequestration combined with January's fiscal cliff deal is expected to slow economic growth by 1.5 percentage points this year - dangerous for an economy now crawling at about 2 percent. It will be even worse if the Tea Partiers refuse to extend the government's spending authority, which expires March 27.

A conspiracy theorist might think they welcome more joblessness because they want Americans to be even more fearful and angry. Tea Partiers use fear and anger in their war against the government -- blaming the anemic recovery on government deficits and the government's size, and selling a poisonous snake-oil of austerity economics and trickle-down economics as the remedy.
They likewise use the disruption and paralysis they've sown in Washington to persuade Americans government is necessarily dysfunctional, and politics inherently bad. Their continuing showdowns and standoffs are, in this sense, part of the plot.

I did some research on government spending:

We are projected to spend LESS in 2013 (in inflation adjusted dollars AND as a % of GDP) than we did in 2009! And we DID spend less in both 2010 and 2011 (again, in inflation adjusted dollars AND as a % of GDP) than we did in 2009!  And that's with unfunded wars started under false pretenses by George and Dick!

So, “conservatives”, just STOP with this crock about how our spending is out of control.  Can we cut MORE?  Absolutely yes!  But we've already capped discretionary spending and, as the economic recovery strengthens, we'll automatically cut tens if not hundreds of billions per year in "social safety net" spending that was automatically triggered by the Great Recession. Not to mention the hundreds of billions in additional revenues we'll generate due to a growing, strengthening economy.

Now, for the important facts: The last three years, the feds have taken in an average of just 15.4% of GDP in revenue.   Since the end of WWII, the average has been 18.1% (and over 19% under Clinton). If we'd been collecting that 18.1% over the last three years, our debt/deficits would be $1.2 trillion smaller... I think we have a revenue problem but until the Republicans stop letting Grover Norquist run this Country, we will not change our tax structure and set a course for full recovery.

Wake up America....there are those in our government that are not interested in finding a solution...their only objective is to sow fear and anger and ultimately get reelected!  Sad!  Very, very sad!

And The Journey continues!